Sunday Sermon

Have you ever sat at church on a Sunday morning and felt that the preacher was speaking directly to you? I had one of those days on Sunday. It was like there was no one else in that church, but me and the preacher. I will start this off by saying that I tend to "sweat the small stuff." Something small will really get to me and it takes several days to get me out of the funk. Most of the things that get me in such a funk have to do with work...although the Auburn Tigers got me in a funk this weekend too! Ha! Going back to work after having Hudson was one of the hardest things that I have had to do. I will say that I am truly blessed that I can work part-time. I know that, I really do. However, working part-time has presented its challenges and it feels like there have been a lot of those since coming back! I like what I do and I love the people that I work with (even with all the drama that is part of the accounting profession--believe it or not, it's filled with drama!). I have felt all along that I am getting the best of both worlds by being able to stay home for part of the week with my sweet boy and also being able to assist in providing for my family financially and allowing Hudson to learn in an environment other than our home. I know that will help him as he grows up. But, there are some days at work that just really get me down, and last week was one of them! I'm not going to say why, one because I know there are some co-workers that read this, but mostly because the reason really isn't worth mentioning. It just was a bad week/weekend and I will leave it at that.

Some days I just wonder why I put myself through all of this...why don't I just go back full-time? I wouldn't have to think twice about buying that shirt at the mall, or taking that trip to the beach, and I would be able to get all of my work done and not be as stressed (keep dreaming, right!), but I wouldn't get to spend much time with Hudson and for 3 months out of the year, I have no life because of busy season. Or, on the flip side, why don't I just stay home? Then I really couldn't buy that shirt at the mall and you can forget about that trip to the beach, but I wouldn't have the stress of work, and I would be able to spend all my time with my little man and wouldn't miss a thing! That sounds wonderful, but motherhood has its ups and downs too and I will be the first one to say that there are some days that I just need a break (and Hudson needs a break from me too!), and not having that extra income really would put a damper on things, although, I'm sure we could make it work. When I write all of this down, I realize that the best thing for me and for my family is to do what I am doing right now. For 4 days out of the week, I get to play with him, love on him, feed him, love on him some more, read to him, hug him...what else could I ever want! And for the rest of the time, I'm helping to make the money we need to help us not have to sacrifice anything and to give Hudson a great life. On a side note, I'm not trying to take anything away from those mothers that have to work full-time or are stay at home moms--I definitely respect both so very much and I could do either of those in the future...this is just what is right for me and my family right now!

As I woke up Sunday morning, I was still in a funk. I was mad at Joel because he got to sleep in and I had to get up early and take care of Hudson (how mature of me, really). I didn't really want to go to church, but I decided that maybe something would happen at church that would make me feel better. It's funny how that happens, because church was exactly what I needed. For the most part, the sermon was about giving back to the church, whether it be in money or in giving time, and this is one way that we can show God how much we love Him and how thankful we are for all that He does for us. It just made me take a step back and look at my life--do I really take the time to do that? All my complaining and getting down about little things and asking why does this happen to me...shouldn't I be thanking God for all that He has given me instead of complaining? There isn't one thing in my life that I have to complain about. I have a wonderful husband, beautiful child, two families that mean the world to me, a great house, great job...I could go on and on. There are so many people in this world that have it so bad, especially right now, and here I am, getting upset over something small that happened at work. It is so not worth it. I should be thankful that I even have a job! I get so wrapped up in the day to day details of life and forget to thank God for all that He has provided me with in life. In the sermon, the preacher talked about a couple that he knew that had a baby several months ago. When this couple got ready to take their new bundle of joy home from the hospital, they made a stop by the church first to thank God for this miracle gift that He had given them. That alone brought tears to my eyes, and to a lot of the other members of the congregation as well! How lucky is that child to be raised with parents like that?!?! I just thought that was so wonderful. A soloist then went on to sing, "He's Got the Whole World in His Hands", and it was so good and so true!

I left church in the best mood and I am going to try my hardest to forget the small things and to remember that I am so lucky and so blessed with all that I have and I have so much love to give. I am thankful for everything God has given me and I am going to prove that to him with the way that I live my life. Yes, there are going to be some things that get me down and I know there always will be, but hopefully I can remember to be thankful for all that I do have.